News

I found myself back in my hometown for the weekend, and when I looked at the local newspaper I found the following headline on page 1 above the fold:

"Local Woman's Card a Hallmark Finalist"

Take that, economic turmoil!
-TC

Quiche

I was chatting with a friend online and informed her that I was making a quiche. When she asked what kind, I replied, "Oh, just my standard quiche."

Does the fact that I have a standard quiche make me a loser? I prefer to think that everyone else is a loser for not having a standard quiche.
-TC

Phil Spector

Today, after many years of extended court battles and public speculation, Phil Spector was finally found guilty of murdering Let It Be.

The most interesting thing about the whole case for me was the discovery that the actual victim, perhaps best known for her role in the 1980's classic Fast Times at Ridgemont High, also appeared in a film entitled Amazon Women on the Moon. Really, with a name like that, how could this movie not be the most amazing thing ever?
-TC

Vermont

As you have all probably noticed by now, Vermont recently became the fourth state to allow same-sex marriages. I can't speak for anyone else, but I for one am horrified by this development. I will never be able to visit my home state again without fear that when I walk into a good Christian gas station and try to pay for a Snickers bar with my credit card, I will sign my receipt and find that I have legally bound myself in unholy matrimony to another man.

This shortsighted act of the Vermont legislature infringes upon all of our civil liberties by insisting people have the right to make personal choices, and there is only one word for allowing such appalling freedom of choice: Socialism. That's right, when a man marries another man, it not only makes them gay, it also makes them card carrying anti-American, terrorist loving, pinko commie scum. (The font on the cards is very small.) But not to worry, the weight of sin added onto the unwashed backs of Vermont's hippie locals will no doubt cause the entire state to dislodge and sink into Lake Champlain which, as I am sure you are all aware, is the doorway straight to Hell. Why else would a giant monster be living in it?
-TC

Tuesday

Today I ate Pakistani food and watched a fist fight break out in the street after a man hit a woman with his SUV. Or, to put it another way, I live in New York City, and it's Tuesday.
-TC