Crazy

I had to work today, and as I was leaving my office, a crazy man walked up to me and said "basketball star, rent a car, state to state," then walked away. I then had another of those moments when I realized that this was probably the most social interaction I would have all day.

On the upside, when I was on the subway home, I thought of a witty comeback to something someone said to me seven years ago. So the day wasn't a complete waste.
-TC

Eye Contact

As I was standing on the subway platform today, a young woman kept looking at me. Whether she was mentally undressing me or thinking about how funny I look is hard to say. But I never got the chance to find out, as the New York routine has become so ingrained in me that all I could think was "don't make eye contact, she'll want a dollar."

The same thing happened a few minutes later on the train, as a young man clearly started making eyes in my direction. But he smiled, which suggests that either he wasn't mentally undressing me or he has a very poor imagination.

-TC

Texting

A study was announced today which said that texting while driving considerably increases the likelihood of crashing. I'm glad we're taking the time to answer the really pressing questions. So glad, in fact, that I can't even wait for a red light to share this ground breaking news.
-TC

Chicken

As I was on my way into the office this morning, I passed by a row of homeless people begging for change. Next to the four or five homeless people was a man in a giant chicken costume squawking at passersby. I was stunned to realize that the depth of this recession is so great that not even chickens can count on a living anymore.
-TC

Tech Ed.

When I was in seventh or eighth grade, we were required to take a class called Tech Ed. In it, we learned about basics of design, use of various shop tools, and other technical skills. One project they had us perform involved building something that would remove a golf ball from a long, thin tube. The most common solution was some sort of broom handle with something sticky on the end of it.

I recalled this project today when I got off the train at Union Square, and found a man using an umbrella to fish bottles and cans out of the bottom of a garbage can that was too tall and had too small an opening for him to simply reach into. That's when I realized that when Brattleboro Union High School taught us basic principles of engineering, they were really preparing us for our future careers among the ranks of the homeless.

Thanks, Brattleboro!
-TC

Screenplay

I just finished the first draft of my first original screenplay in about four years. Being a first draft, it more or less completely sucks, but I'm writing again, and that's the important thing. It currently clocks in at 132 pages. Hopefully when I whittle out some of the more overtly awful bits, it'll start working its way down to a more manageable length.
-TC

Travel Agent

Next door to my office is a small travel agency. They are constantly trying to lure people in with free sandwiches, men on stilts, raffle drawings, and other such gimmicks. As a good New Yorker, I usually make a point to either avoid eye contact or scowl derisively as I pass by on my way to lunch. But today I was passing by, and a woman shouted "real live penguin inside!" I must say, I was a bit intrigued by this. The prospect of seeing a penguin on my lunch break was almost enough of an incentive to interrupt the flow of my day. Almost.
-TC